Wednesday, May 25, 2005

I now firmly believe that modern fitness centers and medieval torture chambers are one in the same thing. I joined the University fitness center today because I am sick of the spare tire I carry around my stomach. When I was younger, I could do 200 situps and 50 or more pushups plus running. Now, I cannot do more than 10 crunches, 10 situps, and ten pushups without being totally wasted.

Anyway, I walk into the weight lifting room and survey the largest assortment of bizarre equipment that I have ever seen. They have machines that just work three specific muscles at a time. I have no clue how to work them. All I wanted was a bench press and a leg press. I cannot find them through all the torture devices that litter the floor.

In medieval times, the inquisitor had to come to your house then take you to the torture chamber. We have internalized this to such an extent that we now pay torture chambers and get into the machines ourselves. We are then advised by the inquisitor about how best to get ourselves to confess our sins (usually involving chippie food).

posted by Chris  #4:34 PM | 0 comments |